Realizations

Am a neophyte in photography....well i know its a long way to go....but then "A journey of 1000 miles begins with a single step" Right??

I did my summers with this Fast Moving consumer Goods company called Marico Ltd...i had the fortune of seeing the much talked about Rural India...this write up is an iota of those myriad experiences during my 2 months of internship.

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Its six o’clock in the morning when I board the rickety bus for Majholi from Jabalpur. Majholi is a small village with a population of approximately 10,000 in Madhya Pradesh. It happens to be just one of many villages that I have been visiting as a part of my summer project.

I grab a corner seat and within no time the bus is teeming with the motley crowd. By the time the driver relents to move (after much exhorting by the passengers) the bus resembles a pack of sardines. Breathing seems to be an effort; the putrid smell is something which I have got used to by now. As the bus moves, the gush of the frustrated summer wind is a respite.

Within an hour of voyage we hit the kutcha roads. Well to be an optimist I would call it a joyride as the bus veers and steers to avoid boulders and pitfalls. The children seem to like it; I can’t help deliberating the fact that we are still a third world country. In housed in the bus is a marriage cluster. They are bubbling with enthusiasm, screaming with delight. The joie de vivre is infectious, you can’t help but smile.

As I am looking outside the shambolic window, my mind is grappling with myriad thoughts. I can’t help but wonder what life are these people leading. Are they happy or not. Do they want more? What would be their aspirations? Who would they want their children to be? What makes them happy, what makes them sad?

Somewhere inside I know there are no answers to these questions. Somewhere inside I know that I don’t want the answers. Yet I cogitate.

I don’t want the readers to sympathise. I just want them to realise that it is a different world- a world which you and I have never experienced. A world where aspirations are never realised, yet they do exist. Their dwelling for us is: the bottom of the pyramid, the rural segment, the undernourished, and the underprivileged sector. For them its life, it’s all that they have.

As the bus passes a small demented hut before reaching my destination, I see a small child running behind it excited by the murky smoke and the trail of dust generated. They say “In dreams begin reality”

I wonder what his dreams are and would they ever be real?

And somewhere between all of it we hang in the void.
Once you look around you notice you are not the only one. The void ironically is teeming with people. Each one of them unique and yet so similar.
I then wonder if I am any different from anyone I lay my eyes on. The story of their life is same, the same …THE SAME.
Society holds all of us to ransom, subtly and at times starkly laying its rules on us.
You can’t break away from it, no matter what you do, no matter who you are…no matter what you believe. Even if you think you do, one day you will realize that all that you have done is changed the rules and conventions you were earlier adhering to. The sooner one comes to terms with it the easier it is to understand oneself. One can never appease the society, there will always be something amiss……there will always be something more they desired out of you.
Well at times for the ubiquitous society’s acceptance we got to change.
Change till it does not become your sole purpose of life. Change for the excitement , change for the challenge…..change to give a befitting reply to the so called society which doesn’t think you are good enough or that you cant do it. Change to see the look on people’s face when you have proved them wrong, change to see how people switch sides the moment you are some one who is at a higher pedestal according to them. Enjoy it but don’t believe in it.
……and yes there will always be comments, frowns, criticisms…part and parcel.
One can’t let the social order affect what we like, dislike or who we like, dislike. One can’t let the social order affect who we are.

Listen to those whom you are close to…for the rest hearing will do.
Yes there will always be exceptions to society. Brilliant! If you find them and for the rest I guess WHO CARES??

Mind is a paradox. At one moment it is logical and at the other logical is irrational. Yet we try to untie the knot getting sucked in the mesh even further. For many a wise and at times erudite the solution lies in an escapade from “reality”, moksh, salvation euphemisms for a break away. In a way I think it’s a perfect solution because you completely blind yourself from all that ever troubles you. Convenient!

I guess it’s more commendable if you fight ‘he who can’t be named’. Moksh is suicidal for your riason-de-etre. Wars are not only meant for invincible but they are sure meant for those who moved where “angels fear to tread”. Our search for alternate reality makes us petty towards the real. I don’t think its wrong to think beyond the obvious but I also know that that’s not the only way.

The beauty of the third planet is that it houses a zillion ideas and beliefs with so many of them justified.

Well the only point I am trying to make here is that it’s ok to be materialistic and competitive. It is Ok to have responsibilities, its ok to deal with cunningness and selfishness. It is ok to at times evince such things. I mean it is ok till you are teeming with life.

Well that does not mean you go on a killing spree....or the likes of that....You get what I mean? Right??

And just because you desire something badly does not mean that you are not in touch with your inner self. I mean come on....I thrive on worldly desires, I seek appreciation, accolade...i love my family and friends.....Why should I give it all up....and then do what....Talk to myself or the spiritual one?? Whatever.....

Well I guess right now I really don’t get it....Maybe one day maybe never

This an except from an article to be published in Business world Mega B school Guide this Feb end....thought will post it because..well generally

In the blink of an eye, in a flash of lightening, in a thousand tears and a zillion smiles…………you are an MBA.

And the blinks, flashes, tears and smiles have each a story of their own. That is what makes Xavier Institute of Management an unforgetful experience.

When you do realise that what you are experiencing is par excellence, as an adept MBA you start taking stock of what is good and what rocks. The sprawling 20 acre campus, world class faculty, the innumerable JLT’s (That is what parties here are called), the rigorous academic schedule, the mughlai of the night mess, the caffeine shots and beyond, you really don’t know what to blame for your elevated existence.

I don’t know if 1000 words can do justice to memories of a lifetime. To reminisce is a daunting task…….the onus of categorizing moments and slotting experiences is an unfair one yet I take up this gauntlet by writing a memoir , not to revisit the past but to acknowledge all that was. My two years have seemed to revolve around assignments, presentations, quizzes, projects, CEO talks and sporadic getaways. But the ensemble transcends it all
Xavier experience resembles a kaleidoscope. It is a diversity of something or piecing together the parts of a symbolic puzzle- your life.

It is difficult where to start. It could be the academic block- the sanctum sanctorum which bears testimony to the grueling academic schedule or the boys’ hostel the walls of which have witnessed and eavesdropped on all my life’s stories.

A typical day in XIM is hard to describe. The academic rigor of the institute is well known. However the scores of classes are as trite as the Sun rising. One hardly seems to notice them. What makes our day is the much desired but occasional lecture cancellations. What makes our day is the quick run to x-café for a bite.

If you bump into a South Indian with an Oriya accent talking French, don’t be surprised. We ximbians have an affinity for languages. Some happen by default (my credentials include Oriya and Tamil) while some by design (German, French to name a few).

We proudly rave about the hard-wired campus, with a full-featured Academic Information System, on the fibre optic LAN. I don’t know if it is a boon or a bane. It does sound cool, such immaculate connectivity, who can complain about that? But when you come back from a sumptuous dinner all ready to hit the bed and then there is a notice on the virtual notice board regarding managerial computing assignment submission in the night or an announcement of a Marketing quiz early morning you really wonder if IT is overrated in this country. You love it, you hate it, but you can’t ignore it.

The XIM community is a small one as compared to some institutes in the country. Its one family. However if you want to descry the stark ends of this family then Xpressions and Maxinations are two events you must witness.

Xpressions-the lambency of which will always glow in my heart as the embodiment of faith, unity and victory is the annual b-school festival of XIM It is 5 days of absolute bindaas fun. The institute is agog with excitement. It’s a carnival with studies duly taking a back seat. The whole XIM junta joins hand to deliver the best to the best in the country. Xpressions is a mélange of presentations, rock show, choreography, quizzes et al which each one seems to savour.
Maxinations is a euphemistic term for war in XIM. Its 4 days of block wars. With each block eying to win the coveted Maxination trophy. Its about product launches, stingy budgets, media planning, recall, awareness…..the 4 days test all your marketing, finance, operational skills. Nobody sleeps during this time, I found it hard to believe when I came to the campus. But today I can vouch for it. The competition is so tough that every minute dissipated is every mark lost.

And carefully interspersed among the classes, presentations, Xpressions, maxinations, xuberance are the tequila shots. Shots of a quick trip to the Puri beach, shots of JLT’s, shots of festival celebrations, shots of food festivals( the Rajasthani happens to be my favourite), shots of basketball matches. Shots which duly live up to the semantics of “motley” and keep our adrenaline pumping.

The famous U2 song “where the streets have no name” aptly describes XIM. There are no specific paths to follow. We make choices, take decisions and humbly receive the consequences. The ambit of our decisions and choices range from trite to profound. Whether it is the decision to form a group, to choose a specialization, to choose a job it’s our call. When you do get in the habit of making your life, the feeling is unparallel.

As my term end approaches I know I have to go and face the “Wild World”. Sometimes I am plagued with the question that whether I am prepared to dive in the deep. The answer is that one can never be prepared for such things. There is always more that you can do. But I am confident that I am ready for it. Whether I trot, canter or gallop is a different issue.

One of the biggest learning’s that I take with me is that my life is a matter of choice and not circumstances. It’s a call I make.
I decide that “I shall not die today”.

Was reading this article on “Marketing and Lying”. Well the topic is debatable. it did unsettle me a little as I happen to plan a career in the same.

I stand up to the debate not in defiance but it acknowledgement.
Do marketers lie? i guess its your perspective. I mean define "lying", and then we can continue with the discussion.
Ok I’ll tell you what i feel, straight from the gut, unadulterated.
They sell you a point of view, not sleazy but a dazzling one.
Marketing sells dreams. They always don't sell reality. Are dreams a lie? Well if that is what you think then so is marketing. But then is it wrong? I really don't know.

A marketer will make a mundane task of taking a bath a magical one. I mean what is the fun of buying soap when all the soaps look the same and they promise nothing more than just clean skin (the truth).
The liril ad was nothing but a realisation that for a typical housewife bathing is the only time when she feels free, thinks about herself and not the family or those around her whom she is bound to take care... How does a housewife's free time translate into a bikini clad girl bathing under a waterfall you may ask? Well it’s because the idea was to sell her a dream and not a reality, exaggeration you may say, that is your opinion.

Most of us look for getaways, alternate realities. Marketers simply bank on this need of people. But then ageing opinions may vary. I mean I don't want too much of reality. I’m already living one. And I really don't mind if someone makes shaving more than just a mundane ritual for me.

Marketers do at time transgress the boundaries and promise an impossible. Ideally it should not be done. But then what can be promised and what can't is again perspective prone.

The only point I am trying to make is that marketing is a mélange of reality, hopes, dreams, ambitions and more.
Disclaimer: You may not agree

I guess I better stop; I tend to ramble at times, so I’ll make it short and simple.
On second thoughts i am not sure about the simple part.

To end here is a quote by Charles Revson, something which i think to a certain extent defines marketing.

"In the factory we make cosmetics, but in my stores we sell hope."

You know I am a serious believer of the maxim "all's well that ends well". Now wait a minute don't get all conclusive with just this statement. I'm sure that is what everybody says or feels but you know this is different.
They always say that it's the journey also that matters and sometimes in our quest for the destination we tend to ignore the "woods so lovely". Well I don't per se ignore the woods but for me it's the ensemble of the journey and the destination that evokes the word pleasant. I might compromise on the journey - it maybe difficult, challenging or emotionally taxing but the end has to be happy. Its like those Bollywood flicks people are killed or die as the case maybe but those who matter survive.
Still a little addled? Let me get you closer home. We encounter so many people in our lives with their influence ranging from tangential to core but not all these entire encounters end as one would want. For me those interactions which did not have a pleasant denouement lose all their peregrination importance. Wrong I guess!

Love, friendship, care, concern are forever or never. You can't switch on and off of them and I have no clue how people are in and out of them. You can start liking people you dislike but how can you dislike those you liked? How? Well that maybe the case if you wear your emotions on your sleeves but why would you do that?

So many questions and such few answers. I don't want anyone reading this to assume my "holier than thou attitude". I do have my own eccentricities and weaknesses but these questions are probably the ones that even I don't understand. One explanation which many have given as a single answer to the questions galore is that human mind is complex and unique so it is important to understand and respect it. Well if you insist.

You know I'll come right to the point rather than beat around the bush. I have tried writing many times and always failed miserably. Not because I cant write or well that maybe the secondary reason. The primary reason is that I don't know what to write.

I am by birth a cribber crabby at times but I am not very sure if that is what I want to write and read about myself years down the line. To be absolutely frank if I meet someone like me I'm bound to hate that person. I am also a dreamer but you know pining down my dreams seems to suck the surreal part of it. I mean writing makes dreams a little more real.

So what exactly is your problem with the real part you will ask? Well I don't know! Your comments and critics are more than welcome. That's one good part about me or about mirage that I create which may seem like one but is real. My instinctive reaction to criticism is that of censorship, but believe me I do take all of it in. though critical remarks sometimes have leaped their boundaries to just heartless quips. But all that's best of dark and bright they have helped me evolve as a person for good I guess. Man is a social animal so it is said and so I believe in. we need to survive in this world and for that we need to listen. Listen to sometimes what we would never want to but we got to. Yes you will find like minded people and people who accept you for what you are but what's the harm in making the peregrination till you find them a little more amenable. Now that we are discussing how important is the society to me…well I do overrate it. I am reminded of the Billy Joel song "darling I don't know why I got to extremes too high or too low there aint no in betweens". No that does not suffice because it's not always extremes for me but most of the times it is. Take friendship, there were acquaintances, there were pals and then there were friends. Friendship for me is ambit infinity. It goes beyond the scope of words, beyond the rigmarole of relationships and transcends itself to a whole new world- a dazzling point of view. When I call somebody my friend the pragmatism vanishes and what remains is a utopian situation where everything is perfect. It's the F.R.I.E.N.D.S song "I'll be there for you coz you are there for me too." How feasible is this simple sentence is debatable. How many of these ideal friends have I had you may ask. Well picture perfect none but then neither have I been close to what I want in others. However there have been times when they have been there for me and in those times it has meant the world to me. In the end it is always about counting colours in the rainbow every time the clouds so grey go.

Have a nice day!

I get up every morning with a restless feeling in me..its usually because i have loads of work to do which i very dutifully procastinate....i mean i just dont know why....there is so much to be done..and i dont do it..its like some part of me wants to stand up in defiance to the world or tasks or whatever....there a people who are very sincere and tenacious and there are peope who are abysmally insincere....and then there are people like me who are just stuck in this middle world oscillating between the two extremes not knowing really what they want...
God give me courage to just work.....(if and only if it was so simple)

I woke up in the morning with a very bad taste.....i mean you know sometimes you just dont feel good....people say that at times they dont feel good for no reason at all...well that has never happened with me becuse i usually know what is bothering me....so this morning i also knew it was some stupid remark some dork has passd on me....well it did hurt..i just wanted to smash his head against the wall....but you know at that moment i just got numb....it usually happens to me..does it happen to you also ?? i mean do you get all numb and all if someone hurts you??....i hate it..i mean if someone troubles you..you should be able to give it back to that person there and then .

Well one thing is for sure he is not going to get away with it ...not that i have some hideous ideas..but yeah! i'm probably going to say somethin meaner to hurt him.....somebody once tried to edify me about forgiveness and all that gyan and i was like listen dude i really dont go on a killing rampage that i have to be all forgiving.....i just like to beat a person at his "own game".....

i am mean to people who are mean to me....thats it...i mean i really dont consciously follow forgiveness...sometimes with time i just like them..but yeah i never forget what they have said....its like some1 who hurts you once is capable of doing it in future....believe me...its a fact...you should not block people who have hurt you because sometimes they may have done it inadvertently..but this you must always be aware.....What says ??

I really dont know what people usually do when they get hurt....i dont understand why some people resign to the non existent facts and become all sad and depressed...why dont they want to fight....listen its the "survival of the fittest"....thats it....i mean at least try....most of our problems we can fight....i seriously believe in it.....at times its the battle against us..our own selves but believe me to win it...is priceless!

Any other ways by which you grapple with the situation??